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Roadside Stop 1

Opening

kyra
Whew... I hadn't slept so well in ages...
pericles
I must concur... I had nearly forgotten what true rest felt like.
edward
(smiles) So, was I right or was I right? It was a good idea to make a stop!
pericles
Indeed. However, now is the time for us to set out anew.
edward
Yeah, yeah, I hear ya. All right, let's...
kyra
Hey, what's all the ruckus over there?
edward
Let's find out!

(The group approaches a caravan advertising the services of three mercenaries.)

eudoxus
(smiling) Come one, come all, and heed my words,
for I am the great merchant, Eudoxus!

The roads are treacherous these days, ladies and gentlemen.
Have you never pondered how much safer you'd feel,
if you had not neglected to hire protectors before you set out?
Let woe consume you not, for I bring the solution to your plight!
These here mercenaries are the cream of the crop!
Hire them to never again know the meaning of the word “danger”!

And because I am a truly selfless soul, a deal of value unparalleled!
Hire your first for free, and the second at a discount!
Thus says the great merchant, Eudoxus. Now!
Step up to the plate, and don't be shy! I shall hear all bids!

kyra
That was the worst sales pitch I've heard in my life.
edward
(smirks) Hey, that takes a special kind of talent too, y'know.
pericles
Still, this is a rather curious instance of happenstance.
This is precisely what we were seeking in crossing the border.
kyra
Yeah, that's true... Think any of these goons are any good?
edward
Since we can take one for free, I say we do that.
Let's take a look at the wares, shall we?

Conversations

Eudoxus

eudoxus
(smiles) Hehehe... Caught your interest, have we?
My name is Eudoxus. The great merchant!
Pray tell, what is your name, young lad?
kyra
Young lad...? Ah, what's the point.
I'm Kyra. I want to hire a mercenary.
eudoxus
(grins) Marvelous! Absolutely and utterly marvelous!
Do make use of our special promotion!
For your second mercenary, we can settle on a very reasonable--
kyra
Uh, hold that thought. Let's just get the special first.
eudoxus
Naturally, naturally... Do take your time.
Speak to the mercenaries, get to know them.
Inform me of your choice at your leisure.

Fructuoso

kyra
You look, er...
fructuoso
(smiles) Greetings! I am a law-abiding citizen trying to make some coin.
My name is Fructuoso, and I am equipped with a custom-made suit of armor.
You ain't ever-- I mean, you have never seen a warrior like me!
kyra
That's for sure...
What do you two think? Is he any good?
edward
(grinning) Bahahahahaha! I'm sold. Hire him. Please.
Custom-made, he says. Hahahahahaha!
pericles
...Compared to your average ruffian, he should be able to soak some blows.
But the armor is clearly not properly adjusted, and is in a state of disrepair.
fructuoso
Y-Yeah, I won't lie, it kinda hurts to move with this on...
pericles
We could not expect swiftness from him, but he might be a decent frontliner.
edward
(grinning) And he's really funny! Don't forget he's really funny.
Honestly, can't fault the lad for a lack of creativity. Hahahaha!
(Fructuoso fidgets awkwardly.)
fructuoso
C-Can you please tell the sailor to stop laughing at me?
I'm trying my best here. I don't deserve this kind of treatment!
You've any idea how hard it is to find a job as an ex-convict?
I repent, all right?! I regret havin' ever been a brigand!
Just give me a chance... Please...
kyra
Hmmm...

If you accept

(Fructuoso jumps in surprise.)
fructuoso
(smiles) S-Shiver me timbers! I'm... I'm hired?!

(Fructuoso bounces with joy.)

Oh, happy day! I'm hired, I'm hired!

kyra
Don't let me down now. I want my money's worth.
fructuoso
You're not paying for me, though...
kyra
Exactly. So just relax, all right? Don't overdo it.

(Fructuoso salutes.)

fructuoso
Yes, chief! I'll be your shield, long as you need me!

If you refuse

fructuoso
Yeah, that was to be expected...
Well. If you change your mind, I'll be here! Waiting!
Hoping! Praying! Probably c-crying a little bit too!

Scymerius

kyra
So, what's your deal?
scymerius
You pay me and I fight for you.
Except you won't pay me, because that idiot's terrible at his job.
Don't worry, though. My fare's coming out of his pocket instead.
kyra
No, I mean, who are you? What are you good at?
Tell me something about yourself so I can make a decision.
scymerius
......
I like green?
kyra
That's possibly the most unhelpful thing you could've said.
Sigh... All right, it's up to you two. What's your assessment?
edward
Something's fishy about this one, that's for sure.
Hiding yer face, yer name and everything?
No good. No good.
scymerius
Actually, my name is Scymerius.
edward
“Your name” is obviously gibberish.
scymerius
Is it?
Ahem... Well, look, I am good with a lance.
Want something skewered and skewered fast, call on me.
edward
Mm... They do look rather quick on the uptake. Competent, too.
Probably the most experienced fighter of the bunch.
Which isn't necessarily a good thing. Who knows who this person really is...
pericles
The fact is, we need allies, and they seem like a good option.
We can always keep a close watch on them.
If they attempt anything untoward, we may act,
and let them face the consequences of their foolish actions.
scymerius
You do know I'm still here, right?
C'mon, I'm not THAT suspicious, right? I promise I'll be on my best behavior.
...Pinky promise?
kyra
Hmmm...

If you accept

scymerius
It was to be expected. I am the best of this rabble.
kyra
Don't get ahead of yourself. You are clearly untrustworthy.
So make sure you don't set even one toe out of line.
You'll find we're the wrong crowd to wrong.
scymerius
Please. Why would I want to wrong my employer?
That just invites bad word of mouth. Worst thing for a merc.
Simply tell me who you want dead and I'll do the rest.
kyra
We'll see.

If you refuse

scymerius
Was it something I said?
Fine. Don't come crying to me when you regret your choice, though.
...Or actually, do come crying. I'll be happy to join up if you change your mind.

Vasiliki

kyra
You're a tad young, aren't you?
vasiliki
W-Well, as a matter of fact, I came of age last year.
(smiles) My name's Vasiliki! I live in a village near Lesmosyne.
My parents are poor, and they are getting old.
It's up to me to provide for them like they did for me.
I'm new to this business, but I'm okay with a bow!
I promise I'll pull my weight!
kyra
Er... I don't know, what's your opinion, you two?
pericles
She looks utterly worthless as a combatant.
(Kyra starts.)
kyra
Pericles...! Not so loud...!
vasiliki
(smiles) It's all right. I know I'm really bad at everything.
Just move on, don't worry about my feelings.
I'll just smile through the pain. Smile... Smile...
edward
Don't just capitulate like that! Bite back, girl!
Look, I'll help you... Uh, maybe on the battlefield you're not so good...
But how about out of it? You got any other talents we could use?
vasiliki
I-I do have a bit of a hobby of picking special herbs...
Did you know there are thousands of different plants in the world?
One day I hope to learn more about them...
kyra
Is this going anywhere, Redbeard?
edward
I have a gut feeling it is. Always trust my gut, Kyra.
Keep going, Vasiliki.
vasiliki
E-Er, a while back I learned how to make basic medicines.
Just for fun, and well... So I can take care of my parents better.
Medicine's expensive, and I don't know if we'll always be able to afford it...
(Edward jumps up.)
edward
(smiles) That's it! Maybe she could make medicines for us!
kyra
That'd be a huge boon!
vasiliki
I'm... kinda slow at it, though... And I can't make them in bulk...
(Vasiliki bounces earnestly.)
vasiliki
(smiles) B-But yeah! If you hire me, I'll totally make you some vulneraries!
kyra
Hmmm...

If you accept

vasiliki
(smiles) Oh, thank you so, so, so much! You won't regret it!
I'm gonna try my very best! I'll make you proud, boss!
kyra
It's just Kyra.
And don't overexert yourself now, you hear?
I don't want your death on my conscience.
Look out for yourself above all else.
vasiliki
(serious) W-Wow... We just met and you're showing such concern...
You're hiring ME to protect YOU, you know!
(smiles) Real pleasure to be working for such kind people! Yessiree!

If you refuse

vasiliki
(smiling) Don't worry. I understand. No hard feelings. This is life.
If by any chance you change your mind, let me know, all right?

After Choosing a Mercenary

eudoxus
(grinning) Ahah! A deal has been made! A deal of epic proportions, dare I say!
This brave soul is yours. Thy bidding will be followed, and thy life be safe!
Hehehe... And now, let us discuss the rates for the other--
edward
Say, Kyra, we were in a bit of a hurry, weren't we?
kyra
Oh, yeah, now that you mention it, so we were.
Better go before Apate starts getting stressed again.
pericles
Let us awaken our companions and depart at once.
Fare thee well, salesman.

(They leave.)

eudoxus
......
(grins) Hehehe... No matter! They'll be back. They're always back.
And then I will make my riches! Hehehehehe!

Inn

Innkeeper
Good morning! Can I do anything for you?
...The folks outside? Oh, don't remind me...
That guy's the most deplorable miser I've ever seen.
Keeps touting his “great merchantness” or whatever around here.
Always about to make the greatest deal of all time, that guy.
But you know what's really great? His tab! He won't pay up!
I tell you, if it wasn't for those hired blades he has with him,
I'd grab him by the eyebrows and I would--

Character Descriptions

Eudoxus
A merchant who claims to be “great,” despite all evidence to the contrary.

Merchant
A merchant carrying goods inside a fragile wagon.

Fructuoso
A skittish former brigand who can't quite embrace the mercenary life.

Scymerius
A secretive lancer whose insistence on hiding their face is suspicious at best.

Vasiliki
A spunky young huntress trying to make ends meet with her bow.